Turn ons: common sense
the sexual tension when u and ur crush are online on fb at the same time and u just stare at their lil green dot
and suddenly you know what gatsby felt like
This is actually the most profound and appropriate literary allusion I’ve encountered so far this week.
oh my god
This is the greatest tweet in the history of tweets
what I want to do for halloween:
what I’ll end up doing on halloween:
For the past hour i’ve been randomly sending this and an audio recording of “Careless Whisper” to friends with no context and no reply.
Update: Sent sexy sax man to my mom at 2am and got in trouble.
LEMME TELL YOU BITCHES ABOUT MY GIRL CARMILLA
FOLKS FORGET ABOUT CARMILLA AND HER WONDERFUL LOVE STORY JUST BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T GET AS MUCH PUBLICITY AS OL’ DRAC BUT SHE’S AWESOME
SHE DOESN’T BURN IN SUNLIGHT BUT DOES WEAKEN CONSIDERABLY TO THE POINT OF FAINTING AND NEVER WAKES UP BEFORE NOON (MY SPIRIT MONSTER IS CARMILLA YO) AND WHEN SHE FEEDS FROM LAURA IT’S ALWAYS FROM HER LEFT BREAST. THAT’S STRAIGHT UP VICTORIAN EROTICA YO. SHE CAN TRANSFORM INTO A CAT AND INTO FOG, SIMILAR TO DRAC, AND HAS THIS LONG, BEAUTIFUL DARK HAIR.
YOU CAN READ THE WHOLE THING ONLINE IT’S OUT OF COPYRIGHT AND STUFF BUT HOLY SHIT A STORY ABOUT WOMEN IN THE 1800S THAT PASSES THE BECHDEL TEST WHAT????
GO. READ IT. IT’LL TAKE YOU BARELY AN HOUR AT MOST.
holy shit i am so reading this wtf
HOLY FUCK I NEED TO READ THIS